Nov 30, 2022
The Holidays and Divorce: How to Make it Work!
It is supposed to be “the most wonderful time of the year” and yet if you are in the middle of a divorce or newly divorced, you might feel anxious, sad and terribly worried that you children will be so disappointed that the memory of that holiday will be the one they remember their whole lives.
Debbie Y. Schneider, Esq., an Attorney at Alpha Center for Divorce Mediation provides tips on surviving the holidays during a divorce.
The first priority is to plan, plan and plan some more. At the Alpha Center we ask our couples to create a holiday schedule in their parenting mediation, encouraging the parties to really give it thought. Flexibility is always a priority but remember if a schedule does not work terribly well, you can modify it at the next holiday.
A sizable number of our couples like to continue the tradition of sharing the holidays, even during and after the divorce. For many of them it works very well. There are distinct advantages, the primary one being that it will likely make the children happy, and it will allow both parents to see the children on the actual holiday. The children’s lives will likely be less disrupted, and there will be no disputes about transfer time.
There are many little ways to make the holiday special. Take your children shopping so that they can purchase a gift for the other parent. If you cannot celebrate with the children in the manner that you want or on the actual day of the holiday, begin creating a new tradition that can be just as significant and meaningful as the original tradition.
Finally, take care of yourself. It is perfectly OK to spend time on your own well-being. Surround yourself with loving friends and family who can truly support you in what can be a difficult transition.
Alpha Center for Divorce Mediation