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Jul 24, 2013

7 Tips for Divorce Survival

Divorce and General Articles

One of my clients in Newtown, PA told me that getting divorced seemed a lot like putting themselves into a blender. After almost 20 years of helping people through our divorce mediation program, I can definitely see why.

Life before divorce had an established foundation of family, friends, home and work. During divorce, these foundations start changing rapidly and it sometimes feels like your life is rapidly whirling out of control. Fear, anxiety, depression and anger become your constant companions.

There is no “magic pill” to cure these feelings although some people do end up taking medication to temporarily ease some of them. The best approach is to follow the following 7 tips that will help you endure these challenging times and emerge stronger and better than ever.

  1. Accept that your life is changing and stop “fighting” it.
  2. Stop beating yourself up and stop beating your spouse up too.
  3. Gratitude is the best gift you can give yourself so be grateful for all of your “gifts”.
  4. Focus on your future life and put your energies toward making it great.
  5. Encourage friends and family to give you extra love but no pity, vengeance or legal advice.
  6. Do everything you can to handle your divorce peacefully, through mediation.
  7. Wait at least two years before you embark on another romantic relationship.

As the saying goes “This too shall pass” and when it is done, those who follow these tips will be amazed at how much better their lives will become.