What is Gray Divorce?

This is a common term used for couples in the 50+ age group who are facing divorce. Divorcing during this stage of life presents unique financial, family, and social challenges that are best addressed with thoughtful planning and good professional guidance. This type of divorce can also be referred to as ‘Silver Splitter.’

Our “Baby Boomer” generation has a well-deserved reputation for defying social norms and conventions. Most of our parents lead us by example and taught us that marriage was “until death do us part”, no matter how bad things got.

Now that we are moving into the final quarter of our game of life, we are finding that more and more of our fellow Boomers are choosing to divorce or having it chosen for them by their soon-to-be ex-spouse.

Divorce is hard at any stage of life and it presents special challenges for those ages 50+. Two of the greatest challenges we face in “Gray Divorce” include:

Financial Fears

In most cases, people in this stage of life are winding down their earning phase and looking more toward their retirement assets to sustain them financially. Divorce generally requires that all assets acquired during the marriage be divided between the spouses which leaves each of you with less than what you held together. There is an old saying that “Divorce teaches you things…like fractions.”

Making wise decisions and planning carefully is critical to the quality of life after divorce for the boomer generation. One of the best decisions we can make is to choose a neutral divorce attorney-mediator who can get us through it at a fraction of the cost of a divorce litigation attorney. We can use the money we save to pay for our own vacations instead of funding great vacations for our attorneys!

Concerns about Kids, Family & Friends

Most Boomers have adult children and some grandchildren who will all definitely be impacted by their divorce. Boomers often have other family members and friends who will also be impacted.

These people generally care deeply about us and will offer their support and plenty of advice. The best thing we can do for them and ourselves is to limit the amount of information we share and let them know that “taking sides” is not helpful.

Remember that it is always best to go to our family and friends for their love and support, but you should seek advice and guidance from the professionals.