Feb 18, 2011
I hope you have been well. Now I know that Valentine’s day has come and gone, but I wanted to allude to the holiday because it truly does fit into the Marriage Success Paradigm. I say that because Valentine’s day is like a thermometer for a relationship. Not only what happens on that day can determine how your relationship is going, but also what doesn’t happen is a factor.
Now, I think that there is a definite divergence between men and women in terms of Valentine’s day. Men generally tend to be less romantic than women. That being said, of course there is the exception, but for the most part men just aren’t as into it. While women can enjoy soap operas, television miniseries, romance novels, and the like, men generally tend to prefer the day to day stuff. Go to work, get home, and enjoy their time off. I think men are very much into the habit and routine of the day. I, for example, am happiest when I know my wife is with me and we are together, regardless of what we are doing. It could be the most mundane and simple thing in the world, but just having her there makes me happy. Dahlia, on the other hand, enjoys spontaneity, and wants to do adventurous and different things. She wants to be surprised. For her, it isn’t truly romantic unless I go out of my way a bit to make her feel special. For me, I feel like everyday is special. Just seeing her, telling her I love her, and being with her is enough. But at times women need a bit more, and it is important for men to go the extra distance.
I don’t think men should be obligated to take their spouse out to an expensive restaurant, or buy a diamond ring, or do all of those must do things. But I do think that they should try to go a bit out of their way to make a statement, to say that “you are special to me.” A card, some flowers, or even a simple token from the heart will suffice. Just don’t let it be another Tuesday.
Kit Rodgers is wishing you a happy week, and is looking forward to spring.